my shoes!!

Ish !! my shoes !!! I really dunno who can so careless wear wrong shoes today after finish our math tuition..I miss my old shoes even thought i just bought a new one.. haha XD

AGHHHH!!!! Exam coming soon so as music festival. I really haven start doing my revision this time. Its quite late actually but i am still lazy to do my revision!!! ARGGGHHH!!!! HELP ME !!!! so as my piece... URHHHMMM??? i really do practice for it but why seems like i am still not good enought yet. I need your support !!! Maybe you do give it to me quitely.. hhahaz DREAMNG ~~~~~~

Tomorrow st.james 6c students gonna have their reunion at upperstar ! YEAh! I am one of the students too. Really so happy can meet my old friends again. I mean those girls.. I think all of them will changed quite alot. haha XD

Happy birthday PRiscillia !!

I went to her birthday yesterday night, LAwl ! They drunk. MAlina drunk and sleep on the floor, hugging people, She spoil her image last night. haha XD I dunno i really did enjoy her birthday last night. We sang , we play and we cry. I mean i cry again last night ! ISH!!! I really so angry myself again, why should i cry again adn again. He told me somethings again last night that made my tears definately will rolled down from my eyes. I really dunno what should i do. I never in this kind of situation before. REALLY NEVER!! I have no idea how to handle it. Its just in the middle, should or shouldnt only.I used to be a tough girl last time but this time, i am not. I can cheat anyone of them but i really cant cheat myelf and my feelings. REally so suffer in this kind of situation now. I use a lot of effort trying to concentrate in my studies only right now cuz exam is just around the conrner.

I saw a lot of sweet couples yesterday and it makes me think again and again. Maybe i am the unlucky one and i need to be alone . Maybe oneday i am not alone again or maybe i still . This is my fortune. I really do hope miracles will appear in my life. Hope to wake up in your amrs someday. =]

its friday again..

Gosh, i feel that i am not even paying attention to class since.. [secret] I really forget since when i will start looking at you .. Probably since few weeks ago. I really adore you so much. I am quite happy yesterday when afternoon cuz yesterday is the 1st time we sms so much since we started become friends. Maybe its a good starting for us. MAYBE ~.. Lots of memories, pictures flash in my mind this few weeks. Really thank you for telling me your feelings and thought yesterday. I am satisfied for this moment. I dont hope anythings will spoil between our relationship right now. Miss the bio class just now!! haha XD Its not the teacher teaching was interesting, its about.. SHHHH.. Better keep it as a secret.. :D

Yeah! Our school bazaar coming !!! really cant wait for it. Lots of food and games ! I must enjoy myself on that day. Hmm... Bubble seems really busy on the bazzar this time cuz she is the chairman for our stall. Thanks bubble ! haha XD We will work hard on it too that day and i will do my best to decorate our stall.. S1 Zhong bazaar stall ! Come to support us !! XD

its just another day..

Hmm, actually its just a normal day for me again. Gosh , today suddenly no current when its time to open the air-con. Hmmm.. So hot and its freaking hot but i still sleeping that time cuz its tired lar ... XD

Today is his birthday and aslo our 9th month aniversarry if we were still togeter now. I can see he is quite happy with his friends today. Happy birthday Kevin ! Wish you will become more mature only. Sweet sixteen ~

My feelings again. i really cant figure it out why today i will think somethings sad again. Ish! Really so tired to being like that. ITS SO HARD TO HIDE MY FEELING and love.. But i must be as strong as him or even much stronger altought its hard to do so. But this is the only way for me now. Actually nothin is hopeless or going too late. I think its just a habit for him only. Maybe we still dunno the meaning of love or even i haven ready yet in a relationship now. I wan to become more lady, cuz i really wanna 2 change my style or personalities. I am controlling myself not to think too much, i just wanna 2 keep myself busy only. But dunno why, i wont tired aslo. Lameo ..
I duno isnt it worth to do so, I really dunno what he thinks right now. STRANGER!!!! Hope time can cure my sadness faster .. Really do appreciate the chance if i had now. But , no if in my life now, just fact only. Its my own life and i will handle it as pretty as i can. Wish me good luck XD

习惯和爱情

习惯和爱情？只怕你把习惯当成爱情而已。
I really so hate myself, why i cant clearly be strong, why should i think of that again. Its just make me more sad and hate being myslf only. I really trying to improve myself. But, i duno i got do so or not? Love cant hide, feelings too. I really cant cheat myself, maybe i could cheat others but i cant even cheat myself. But i really wont cry anymore, i really hate to cry now cuz is not a way to solve problem. Its my fade. Maybe this is just a lesson for me, for cherish something precious to you. But i really cant stand those complaint again. Stop being like that k? I didnt say anythings doesnt mean that i really did or feel so, just i dont wan to talk anymore. Just wasting the time. Life still goes on. I am stil living, i am trying my best to concentrate in my studies. Those shattered piece just leave it there. Use super glue aslo no use for me now cuz its hurt. I really dont hope to hear any complaint and make me to know or see somethings that dissapointed me. Its tired to being like that. Love and habit, i aslo not sure now.

my sunday!

today i went out for movie wit my frens. We saw transformer today. Gosh man, almost three hours and damn freezing cold inside but its really quite a nice movie. Love her body, so sexy ! haha XD i saw the Mc donald ice cream stall again, just then i realize, i didnt eat ice cream for quite a long time. I didnt even buy ice cream to eat just now cuz i really dont need ice cream anymore. Its makes me gian weight only. xp I think today will be a quite and peaceful night to me aslo. Enjoy~

today is today..

HAPPY B'DAY KUANZ. haha XD sweet sixteen ~

lawl. today is kuanz =betty's biday. Oh ya, forget ask him to wear the dress and put on the make up just now in his b'day party. haha XD well, we keep took ss pic or even video on his big screen computer just now, that was all malina's idea. its really crazy but kinda fun.. hmmm.. =]

well well well, again and again. non-stop. i duno isnt a full stop or question mark? as long as, i know many things like *COUGH COUGH* wit this happening. piss off man! i really being tired to see it,really like an interesting or even a LAMEO movie! you really a drama queen&king , its true !you can get both of it. Suit you cuz u never feel enough. you worth to be it k? cuz its really doesnt matter to me cuz you are just a lier only..

16th day? lawl. no comment wit it. things seems .. Errrr............. DUNO!

the 14th day

Today is the 14th day we broke up. Its really not worth to be like that actually . I really cant figure it out why its too late as long as you have the heart and confidence to changed and face everythings together. Actually i am really damn sad at the past few days but till today, i think i am being ok. I can control myself not crying anymore, i can control my mind not thinking of the negative way anymore but sometimes i still do cuz i am human and human got feeling! Maybe that its not the real things or the real person i met before, i not sure, Its really seems so strange to me now, its like a brand new things in front of me and i totally cant get what its thinking or what. I dont even know this person now. Everythings seems so fake to me right now,just like i am awaken from the dreams.Things changed, but its changed too fast till i cant even accept it. I am quite disappointed actually, its really hurts my feeling. I dont hope anythings happen badly between me and him again. Time can proved everythings or time can heal the sadness?? Let's see now.. i really dont wish to hear anythings from other people now cuz this just involved between me and him. I am so tired of it, i am not a robot, i aslo will tired. I dont hope to care anythings more. Its really doesn't matter to me now. The more i step deeper into it, the more it turns bad. The only things i could do now is really fully concentrate in my studies. Its not a big deal right ? XD Everyday is a brand new day for me and i have promised myself to smile everyday. I need to be as happy as i could cuz crying its not a way to solve problems. I am growing up now. I am being matured. I gonna to change myself. Wait to see a brand new ESTHER !! [hope i really could do so] really just 顺其自然 lo. no forcing please. I really get it now. Thanks ..!! :D